This’ll be fun. Go to the picture album in your phone and imagine how you would explain the most recent pictures in there. No holds barre. That is what I’m going to do because I’m at work and its slow right now. So let’s take a look into my weird, sad, sometimes funny life. This should be deeply insightful. Right? Wrong…..
I have two jobs. This is a pretty exciting part of my second part time job I work at night. No, I’m not a janitor. I work at an escape room. You and up to 7 of your closest friends let me lock you in a themed room and you have to solve a series of puzzles, riddles, and locks to escape within 60 minutes. In between each game, I mop. I don’t mind it much. Mopping is actually pretty relaxing. Plus I take solace in the fact that once the mopping is done, another game starts. And then I get to watch another bunch of goofballs try to get out of a locked room via surveillance camera.
I sat down for 10 minutes in between jobs. Then I became a chair for Stella and Watkins. Then they molested each other. It wasn’t peaceful at all.
Its been unseasonably warm in Buffalo this winter. Today we hit 61 degrees for the high. Record breaking! The iced over pond in my backyard melted. Now its just a medium sized mud pit. My “children” thought it would be fun to play in it. They played and played and played. And it WAS super fun. Until we turned black from the mud and mommy needed to give us a bath. We HATE baths. Just look at my face. Two inches of water is the most terrifying thing in the world.
My little cousin is in the US Navy stationed in Hawaii. He is originally from Buffalo, NY and is a DIEHARD Bills fans. He managed to grab free tickets to the ProBowl last Sunday. During halftime he was standing in a concessions line and someone saw him decked out in his gear and was like, “Hey Rex Ryan is sitting in section K!” Of course that’s where my cousin went next, immediately found our head coach, and popped a squat. Seeing as how there was a little free space next to him, he got to spend a pretty cool quarter of football watching our very own Tyrod Taylor throw the ball around. Now THAT, is pretty damn awesome.
This is Chris. We’re just sorta starting to see each other. He is a Registered Nurse at a local major hospital. He’s also in PA school. We both have extremely busy schedules. So sometimes when we get a chance to see each other, homework is involved. And sometimes if he’s lucky, Stella helps him with his homework. If we keep this routine up, he’ll be a PA in no time.
Okay, technically this is a recent screenshot. But it still counts. This is an example of what men think are a good idea on Tinder. Maybe he’s trying to be funny. Maybe he legit thinks this is a good idea. I honestly don’t even know anymore. I used to be a pretty good judge of men. Then social media and 2,000 different dating apps happened. Now it nearly impossible to sift through the crazies, the men who are just wanting to get laid, guys who you ACTUALLY have things in common with/good dudes. Its really becoming not even worth it anymore. I’m going to have to start spending a lot more time at groceries stores like all the other single 30 year old ladies.
My sister was in town last week from Dallas and one night we all went to a pretty cool venue downtown for a roller derby game. The place is pretty cool. Bar/restaurant/mma fighting ring/hockey and curling rinks/roller derby. There is a lot going on there. The derby has matches on Friday nights and tickets are roughly $20. This girl (?) purchased a ticket, sat down in the second row, ate approx 4 slices of concession stand pizza, and never looked up from her Nintendo DS. I had to take a picture because this is what “leveling up” in 2004 looks like.
I mentioned at the beginning of this nonsense that my night job is at an escape room. One evening I was at work and there was a group of 7 grandmas in the spooky hotel themed room. This is all of them trying to figure out the puzzles and get out. And it was adorable. I love my job everyday I go because of groups like them. Towards the end, a couple of them were more excited to get out of the room so they could make their dinner reservations on time and go drink. Another one was swearing at her friend. Another one was sorta just sitting down on the bed in defeat (probably dreaming of that Manhattan she was about to go get). I wish these ladies would come back to my job everyday.
My day time job is waitressing at a small upscale breakfast restaurant. One morning the IRL version of the cranky old man came in to eat. It made my day. According to this particular article, I guess you could infer that I think older people are pretty much the best. They are pretty damn cute and they say some really adorable shit.
This is one of my best friends, Carley. She lives in North Carolina now but comes homes to visit often. This could be us tailgating in the line waiting to get into the Bills games or it could just be a regular Sunday. Both look fairly similar. (It was a Bills games) We go hard at Bills games. Actually all of Buffalo goes hard at the games. Its how we survive the winter.
This was just a small peek into the past couple weeks of my life. Hope you enjoyed at least some of it. God know I only enjoyed some of it.